Tuesday, March 15, 2011



Hello--I am high. No, not on that. I flushed that down the toilet and boiled the accompanying gadget so none of that could be scraped out of it (the gadget) in a moment of weakness. Everyone has moments of weakness, right? And luckily, moments of strength. Which is when, personally, I flush shit (ooh! double meaning!) down the toilet.

So! Anyway. I meant high on sugar. I haven't done this in a while. But tonight I had a CRAVING and concocted chocolate sauce out of baker's chocolate, butter, milk, water, and sugar, and poured it on top of raspberry crunchy cereal, then put whipped cream on top of it. Yum! High.

I haven't written here in a while. That's been strange. But I think it's because, as I said in a recent post, I've needed a break from the blog. And also, perhaps there's been some stuff happening and I haven't felt much like writing about my life.


It's spring! Spring is springing up and down, jiggling its cheeks like a frisky clown. Say what? Say "FRISKY"! "FRISKY"! "FRISKY"!

"Frisky," in my opinion, is a greatly underused word. I am going to try to use it here to make up for its lack of use in the general lexicon of American babble:

This morning I woke up at 6 a.m. to put the trash out because I had procrastinated the night before and was afraid of being attacked by the pack of frisky wild raccoons that stampede through the attic at ungodly hours. I threw my phone at the wall when it started doing its frisky fucking alarm noise because I had been up till very late not feeling frisky or even fanatical about flapjacks or anything related to being chipper and annoyingly jolly. When I opened the door to the garage I noticed that the rats had not eaten (friskily or not friskily) any of the laundry, and that made me slightly debonair. I tried to quietly roll the trash can out to the street but it was loud so I gave up and figured the neighbors wouldn't mind being woken up a little bit earlier on such a goddamn frisky morning.

I went back to bed and slept friskily for five more hours.


Welp, that's that! Now we can move on to other things. Like the recent alleged "time change." Excuse me, but do you take me for an idiot?!?! NO THANKS BUCKAROO, I DON'T BUY THAT CRAP. Time change belongs in fantasy novels featuring frisky half-insect humanoids, NOT in my world. Thus: the computer says 1:58, but forget it pal, I ain't no sucker. It's 7:21 a.m. and/or p.m., and it will be that way as long as I say so. So there. Time change, my FRISKY BUTT.

WOOPS! That didn't sound right. Never mind.

Anyway, it's spring, y'all. Persephone is climbing out of the cave, or whatever the myth said. Sailing down the river Styx in a mega-yacht. Sprinkling petals hither and thither. Fro and aft, totally daft. The leaves they are a-coming in, and yes, I am somewhat intoxicated on the merry glee that is the rebirth, so to speak, of the Northern Hemisphere at this time of year, and which I am trying to enjoy without thinking too much about natural or, more appropriately, unnatural disasters, those frisky earthquakes and things that are wreaking a bit of havoc here and there and which I am afraid--

Woah, bummer topic there! Let's try to stay positive, shall we? Remember: "frisky"!

Before sitting down at the computer I was making earrings so I can try to become a wealthy artist. For some reason I was having gargantuan amounts of difficulty coming up with even simple designs, and in three hours I only made six pairs. WOW. Not very frisky.

My plan is to do a table on South Congress in a month. Wish me luck! I've made one Space Delight (mobile) and hope to have six billion more. For that to happen, great quantities of sugar will need to be consumed. Raccoons will need to be sacrificed. Frisky freaks, the names of whom I'm not naming, will need to go to bed earlier and sleep less lately. Even if they're up doing "important" "stuff" like "finally" writing in their goddamn "blog" after so much time has passed that frisky or unfrisky readers might think it's THE END.

Which it is. The end.


1 comment:

Cassandra said...

hi. high.

recommended antidote to sugar high?
large quantities of vegetable fried rice. the more greasier to betterer...

personally the rain is making me feel like oatmeal. no, not making ME FEEL like oatmeal, but making me feel like EATING oatmeal...come on people!!!


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