VISITS

Hello, and welcome to fucking!!! Bedlam.

Sorry to swear--I know some readers probably don't like it. But given my physical state--deeply unwashed, harried, gorging on a salad while trying to fit some creative stuff between the fourth? fifth? recent washing of the kitchen floor and the within-an-hour departure to Ross to get some towels to replace the not really acceptable Spongebob ones--it's feeling really good to let loose, at least internally, with some Tourette's-style cussing.

I know I've mentioned it in some of the last posts, but since the week before Thanksgiving we've had out-of-town visitors, family and friends, staying with us for varied lengths of time: my sister and her boyfriend left the day before yesterday, my other sister and her fiancee, and his two children, are coming today; my parents have been with us, off and on, since a little before Christmas; before that we had my cousin, his wife, their kids, my stepdad, my brother, his wife, their baby, our friend, and Joedy's brother's two kids. It's been great having everyone here--we've had lots of fun, and the chance to reconnect, or connect more deeply, is a real gift--and I'm already experiencing the long-term benefits of the visits, in that my thoughts and associations with this house are permeated with happy memories, but it would be untrue to say there hasn't been some tiredness and sadness mixed in too. With nineteen people visiting in the space of two months, a period that began two weeks after we moved into this house, it's normal, I think, for some of us to have some ups and downs.

Especially if they're badly in need of a shower. And their goddamn sneakers are wet from washing the floor, and they have a chin hair that's threatening to rival the clothesline in length and durability.

One more thought before I attend to the unwashedness and the unpluckedness: this time last year, I was feeling really horrible because I'd invited everyone I knew and didn't know to stay with us in Costa Rica, where we thought we'd be living longer than we did. When we went back to the States for a visit in November and realized we couldn't go back to Costa Rica, it was compoundedly awful because I felt like such a schmuck for inviting people and then so soon canceling our side of the plans (this was especially bad because my sister and her boyfriend had already bought plane tickets). I'll always regret the way the end of our time in Costa Rica played out, but having everyone with us here, in Austin, has made me feel like I've gotten another chance at hosting them, at throwing a gigantic New Year's party, and that, I have to say, feels great.